Comparison Is the Thief of Joy
Do you remember the days before social media? If the answer is yes, you are officially OLD.
Venture out into the world in any major city and you’ll be surrounded by a sea of people looking down at their phones. Estimates vary, but 2018 statistics show most people check their phones 58 times a day and spend an average of 3 hours and 15 minutes a day on their phones overall. What did we do with that time before smartphones were invented? Get drunk? Have sex? Engage in actual face-to-face conversations with other humans? The possibilities are endless. Most people can’t go longer than 1 hour and 43 minutes without touching their phones during the day (citation). Try it! It’s harder than you think. Perhaps the weirdest part is the cloying sense of anxiety that comes from not being completely up to date with a vast quantity of pointless information (what’s Kim Kardashian wearing today? OMG!) at all times.
“Smart phones have changed our emotional lives in strange and unexpected ways. ”
Smart phone technology may have altered our social landscape forever, but is it for good or ill? Are we doomed to be a generation of phone zombies, eschewing other forms of human interaction, or can we mindfully harness the connectivity of social media for greater good? Social media has been part of our lives for the past 18 years. The start of a new decade seems a good time to reflect on what it all means.
Here’s a timeline of the launch of each major platform:
2002 Linkedin - 2003 Myspace - 2004 Facebook - 2005 Youtube - 2006 Twitter - 2010 Pinterest and Instagram - 2011 Snapchat
“ Anything that makes teenagers more difficult is
cause for alarm.”
In recent years, debate has raged over the effects of social media on mental and emotional wellbeing, particularly in reference to our youth. Studies suggest a link between social media use and depression, anxiety, reduced sleep quality, lower self-esteem, inattention and hyperactivity, especially in teenagers (citation). Anything that makes teenagers more difficult is cause for alarm. What’s unclear from the research is whether high levels of social media use are linked to depression, or if depressed and lonely people are more likely to use social media in an attempt to alleviate negative mood states. Sad chicken or broken egg? It’s hard to know. Awareness of mental wellbeing and disorders like ADHD has improved in recent years, which may also account for an apparent increase in mental health problems.
What’s impossible to deny is that social media exposes us to constant images of people whose lives appear to be more exciting, fulfilling and affluent than our own. Repeated reinforcement of perceived lack of success, whether it’s a mansion by the sea, Kylie Jenner’s shoe collection, or an Instagram model’s retouched bikini body, isn’t a recipe for happiness. There’s a term for it: fear of missing out, or FOMO. Feelings of inferiority and irrelevance could lead to self-destructive behaviours in vulnerable individuals seeking validation against an impossible standard that often isn’t a true reflection of reality. People go to great lengths to portray their lives as worthy of envy. Why would they do that? And why are we buying into their false FOMO fairy tale and making ourselves feel bad in the process?
Perhaps it’s because we’re ADDICTS.
“Disturbingly, social media applications are designed to trigger addiction responses in users.”
One researcher noted the following:
“The likes, comments, and notifications we receive on our mobile devices through social apps create positive feelings of acceptance… Our minds are being ‘brain hacked’ by these apps and social platforms… research and development dollars are allocated to determining how technology can stimulate the release of dopamine during product use to make us feel good about ourselves. When we are not getting this dopamine release from our apps and smartphones, we feel fear, anxiety, and loneliness. The only remedy, for some, is to get back on the device for another pleasure release.” (Darmoc, 2018)
If you find yourself feeling panicky without your phone, it may be time to rethink your social media consumption habits. Perhaps the best thing we can do is be more mindful of how we use social media. It’s like your mother always told you: moderation and good choices.
https://blog.rescuetime.com/screen-time-stats-2018/
https://www.spineone.com/blog/surprising-truth-text-neck/